It Is A Pleasure To Challenge Conventional Wisdom

I don't often post twice in a day, but I felt this warranted capturing.

The conventional wisdom in cities like London is not to give to the people one sees begging on the streets. The arguments range from "all your doing is paying for their drug habit" to "they are professional beggars who send the money home" and all points in between. I think that this one-size-fits-all thinking is dangerous and instead prefer to use my own judgment.

I have long supported the Big Issue and its vendors and while not adopting any of them I have favoured a few with my custom. As I have blogged already my faith in that effort has been reinforced with the movement of Eddie who was my local vendor onto a new job as a road sweeper in the New Year. When he told me the news it was with happiness and pride in his voice and it moved me more than a little.

So to today, New Year's eve. It is a wet miserable day in London and as I walked out to get some lunch I passed a young man (20's I guess) sitting with his dog sheltering under plastic sheeting. To be fair he was not begging, but just sitting there. I decided spontanteously to give him a few quid and when I did he thanked me profusely.

I walked on, but my mind was caught up thinking that on a day like this he would not be sitting there for fun. I was also very aware how lucky I am with a house and family to go home to and, for now at least, no real money or health worries. I then decided that I would go one step further and as I ordered my take-out hamburger I ordered a second. This was from one of the better burger chains and I was not sure what he would like. I went for a simple classic burger for him and then sat and waited.

About fifteen minutes later my order was ready and I walked out with two burgers, one for me and one I hoped he would accept and enjoy. As I approached him I reached into the bag and pulled out the box and offered it to him. Being a Brit I apologised, of course, that it was just a basic, classic burger, but hoped he would enjoy it.

Well his eyes lit up as he took the box, you could have seen his smile a mile away. He thanked me profusely again saying that a burger was burger. He then opened the box and saw what was inside - a really good 6 oz burger in a nice bun and if it is possible his smile was even brighter.

As I walked away I looked back and he was immediately eating the burger and I felt I could hear his pleasure. I have no idea when he last ate, but I am glad that I followed my instinct and decided to "give" to this man today. I found I had a lump in my throat as I re-entered the office and even now as I write this I feel quite emotional.

I did not give to him to make me feel good, but rather in recognition of how lucky I am and that I can afford to give back to those less fortunate. That said it is good to give and I feel a better person for doing so.

Whether I will see him again I have no idea. I am not aware of seeing him before so on Thursday when I am back in the office he may well be gone, but that does not distract from the act nor will it discourage me from exercising my judgement again in the future. This does not make me an easy touch for any beggar, but it does confirm that I am a feeling and compassionate being. It does not harm to remind oneself of this every now and then in this increasingly uncaring world.

So I sign off 2013 feeling rather emotional, but also rather pleased. I hope to build upon this in 2014 and commend any reader who feels personally fortunate to consider how they might help at least one other person in the coming weeks and months.

Happy New Year one and all.

New Tricks For An Old Dog - Skills for 2014!

As 2013 draws to a close, I thought a light-hearted blog (with a little message inside) was called for so here goes.

I was in New York just before Christmas and bought my first ever pair of Levi 501's. The additional first was that these have the first button fly I have ever worn in my over 50 years of life. When trying them on in the shop I only did up the top waist button so it was only when I got them home I encountered my challenge.

Now I have talked before about some skills you should learn from your father; things like how to shave, how to handle yourself in a barbers, how to get your shoes polished, etc.. I hadn't thought that fastening one's trousers fell within this arena - one just knew how to do this. With a zip fly my technique is fasten the waist band then pull up the zip - simples.

When I did this with the button fly, the technique let me down. In part this was because the demin was new and stiff so any buttoning was harder than necessary, but more importantly doing up the waist band then cramped the space left for my fingers to manipulate the studs. I hurt my fingers and failed to fasten the top stud.

Now my father was not around and my house is full of ladies so I had to work this out myself - and I did. I realise that this may be second nature to many readers, but to me this was new. The secret (if one can call it that) is to button the fly from the bottom stud moving up and fasten the waist band last. So simple really, but as I said a first for me.

So now I have added a new skill to dressing arsenal - I can fasten button fly trousers! :)

The next one I want to master is this method for tying a tie.

With these I should be all set for 2014!!!!

Happy New Year one and all ....... and why not look out for the new skills you have aquired in 2013 or want to learn in 2014.

Breakfast at Tiffany's - Counting One's Blessings

I blogged yesterday about my visit to New York last weekend with my wife and daughter. This is a trip we have done a number of times though this year there was a question whether my daughter would come given she is now 18. Indeed the same question was asked about our holiday to Santorini and I hate to count the number of times either or both my wife and daughter stated "they were not going if 'she' was!" In the end both trips happened with a full complement and we're successful. That does not mean there were not a few incidents, but they were rare.

Anyway, back to their purpose of the post. I was asked what was best about the trip to New York and I replied that I just enjoyed it when my family, small as it is, is together. I also realised that it is only when on holiday or trips like this last one that we ever breakfast together. Our various work and until recently school times meant it was rare to start the day together and indeed my wife and daughter don't rate breakfast and often skip it.

So for a week of hotel breakfasts on holiday and a variety of locations in New York we ate and started our days together. In New York it could be as simple as a cream cheese toasted bagel and coffee or the more complete range of options at Ellen's Stardust Diner (where talented would-be Broadway artists serve and entertain as you eat - highly recommended by this family!), but it contributed to my enjoyment of the trip.

Now on most trips my wife has collected something from Tiffany's and indeed this time we did look, but we left without the turquoise bag - maybe next time.

Last evening I took to my bed immediately on returning home. I had a stinking cold and felt lousy. I was in bed for 12 hours asleep for most of it, but there were occasions when I woke and heard "happy" sounds from downstairs and indeed heard my daughter singing. I remember smiling as I listened.

These are the moments to remember and treasure. They are what I strive for as a father and a husband. I suspect and indeed I know that there are times when others think I come up short, but while I can build this sort of memory then I can't be doing all bad. We should all count our blessings wherever they come from and however you count them.

Liar's Poker and 9/11

This is something of a mixed post so bear with me. The first reference to Liar's Poker reflects that last night my journey home was something of a nightmare. A tree had taken out the overhead wires on my line and trains were badly disrupted.

When I eventually got on a train going in the right direction, I at with some football supporters off to watch West Ham and Spurs. To pass the time they started playing Liar's Poker, essentially bluffing on the serial numbers of bank notes. It is years since I have seen that played and in fact I doubted anyone did so any longer. It was the title of a book by Michael Lewis (1989) and seen to capture the excesses of bond traders and salesmen on Wall Street. If you haven't read the book I would suggest you do. It is not a hard read and a reminder of many things that were bad in the system and that we are still trying to fix.

The second part of the title relates to my visit this last weekend to Ground Zero and the new memorial garden. My family and I have been to New York a number of times just before Christmas. We went before 9/11 and then again in December 2002. While not visiting each year when we have been there we have always visited the site and shared some of its journey.

When we first went they were still clearing debris and the little church of St Pauls, where many of the rescue workers received support and succour, was still surrouned by railings festooned with tributes. Inside it was a functioning church but still full of the memories and memorabilia from that dreadful yet inspiring time.

The railings were cleared some years ago and the inside of the church better organised. The intention being to use many of the items inside a museum, that has now been built but will not open until Spring 2014. The residual presence of material from that time is still poignant, making a visit to the church an emotional event for most visitors (myself included).

When we looked back we had not been to the site for three years and this year we found new towers had risen into the sky and the memorial garden was now open. We queued and went through a full security check to get into the garden where we found the two "pools". These are the footprints of the two towers. Around the edge of the two pools the name of each victim is cut out from the metal. A white rose is placed by each name on their birthday, but something that touched me more were the names where clearly someone (or many) had stood there tracing the names with their fingers. For these names the edges of the cut has work to shine with the patina removed showing the metal underneath. They are clearly not forgotten.

The pools themselve are vast with water cascading down the sides from the edges to a pool level that at its centre has a well that the water then falls down. It was not possible to see the bottom of that well.

In that garden too is the one tree that survived the collapse of the towers. It was an eight foot stump when it was removed from the site and nurtured back to health. It suffered an uprooting during a subsequent storm, but survived that too. It is now known as the "Survivor Tree".

Somehow it all felt very apporpriate. I did wonder if this was closure and the end of our journey with tragedy of 9/11, but I suspect not. While I did know of people killed in the collapse I did not actually "know" anyone, but that day I watched it live on TV and it is something that will never leave me. I think it likely that I will visit every time I am in New York as there will always be something to gain from the experience.

Better late than never!

I am a pretty tolerant person - you can ask anyone who knows me. I tend to see the best in people, give the benefit of the doubt and start from a position of being prepared to trust another person until/unless they prove unworthy.

The number of people I would say I dislike from my life is very small - less than one hand - so it has been a matter of some personal discomfort that someone got under my skin and has had me spitting feathers  more than once. I really did not understand why I could not get past that feeling of dislike/distrust.

Last night I met up with an old friend and somehow, I can't recall how, this person cropped up in conversation. We had a chuckle about certain aspects and I found myself going over what was said in my head as I walked home. I suddenly realised why this person was "different".

Before I explain let me say a little about the person.

A few years ago they came new to the company I then worked for and took over a small department I had built and led. Them taking over was not an issue as I was ready for a change and indeed had a role to take up. What started causing the problem was than they then ripped up pretty much everything I had built bringing in a whole new team and re-inventing the wheel many times over.

I should say that rapacious and incessant self-publicity was a key feature of this individual so shortly after they started re-engineering my department, when a contact suggested I looked at this person's linkedin profile I did so. On it there was a claim under education that they had been at the LSE for five years! This did not ring true, so I pulled a favour and another contact checked the academic roll of the LSE for the years in question. They found no trace at all, maiden name, married name, nothing!!!

For me this form of dishonesty is for me what would be called a deal-breaker. I judged that I could not publicly call them on it as that would be seen as sour grapes and bitchiness. Instead I calibrated how I would deal with them in future.

I should say their life path has been slightly exotic since then with the lack of ability to back up their self-promotion being found out on at least one notable occassion.

While our paths have not crossed for a long while this still left a bad feeling inside and periodically it has risen to the surface again. So last night was something of a reprise and cathartic release, but I also had an epiphany.

The real problm I have with this person is not that they were dishonest (though I do have difficulty with liars), or that they dismantled my work, but rather that they, without caring, damaged the careers of the staff I left in that department. They were side-lined, ignored and pretty much discarded. This despite them being good and capable people.

Now I have no problem with my work being challenged and improved, hell I certainly don't know best in everything. Indeed times change and as they do often need alternate approaches. But I recruited that team, I coached and trained them and I know they were good. If they committed a crime, it was only that they had worked for me and done as I had asked. They did not deserve to be treated so badly. Fortunately they are resilient people and have survived and bounced back to differing degrees. I have helped as and when I could, but their recovery is a credit to them.

So, now I think I understand why this person got under my skin. It was the careless way they treated  good people that I respected and cared about, setting back their careers substantially. I will still give the benefit of the doubt and hold onto the belief that this was not a case of malice, but rather blind ambition, the pursuit of which permitted the use and discarding of others. That person could not do that with me then and certainly cannot do it now....so they are of no concern.

Now I understand I expect the memories and my bad feelings towards them to fade into the distance - frankly they are not worth anymore of my energy or time.

Renewed Faith in the Big Issue

For some years I have been a supporter of the Big Issue and its work. My wife will tell you that I usually buy a copy of the Big Issue when I see it, always paying a little more than the cover price. I like the fact that their "clients" are held to a code of conduct and are working to help themselves.

While I do try and spread my purchases around there are inevitably some vendors I buy from more than others. One have seen in the City selling at the same pitch for four or five years and I started wondering whether selling the Big Issue had become an easy option, a habit maybe even an addiction in some way. What was going to move him up the next step to re-establishing himself in society. I once voiced these concerns to a member of the Big Issue management team and they confessed that this was something that worried them.

So yesterday it was with some joy (yes, I said joy!) that as I bought a copy from another (regular) vendor near Liverpool Street Station he told me that he had just three weeks left. There was a twinkle in his eye as he told me that next year he would be sweeping streets and that then he wanted to go on to be bus driver. He told me that one of the street sweepers around Liverpool Street had "got him in".

He told me he had been selling the Big Issue for two years and that was enough. I have seen him out there is the cold and wet, day after day. Always polite.

I have no idea how much the Big Issue staff helped him and how much was his own doing, but on the whole the experience and opportunity seems to have helped this man. I have no idea of his back story, I would not presume to intrude, but I felt so pleased that he was so happy to have job. Now sweeping streets is not what everyone would aspire to, but I say "Good on you and good luck".

When I see a street sweeper next year I expect I will check and see if it is him. Either way it has renewed my faith in the Big Issue. It may not be able to help everyone and it may have become entangled in scandals about Roma's taking over pitches, but if it helps some like this man then it is worth supporting - and it is a good read!

I commend you to look again at the Big Issue vendor you see in the street, someone you may have stopped noticing, and ask yourself if you can help with a purchase. Similarly maybe look more benevolently on the street sweeper that is easily overlooked and consider how this job may be part of a long hard journey for him (or her). A smile might just lift their day and yours.

Vision of the Regulatory Project Manager of the Future?

Now before anyone riles at this I am not suggesting that project managers of the future will be flys, but rather that they will need the optical capabilities of a fly, taking multiple perspectives of a problem This was the most striking picture I could find.

Recent regulatory changes have been increasingly complex, drafted by a number of regulators and impacting businesses with operational and commercial footprints spread across the world. As a result it has become apparent that one has to look at any change from a number of perspectives, some of which are not immediately obvious. Additionally one has to be cognisant of the limited perspective of any advisor as it will limit the advice they can give and the confidence one can take from them.

Imagine a Gibraltan fund that markets into the EU and has appointed fund managers in the US and Japan with a global UK-based custodian. For almost any change now one really has to look at impact and validity of solutions from four or five different perspctives. What is acceptable in Gibraltar and the US may create another problem in the UK or EU. If you just ask the funds Gibraltan lawyers they are likely to look at some aspects, but it is unlikely they could or would want to be held responsible for every relevant domain.

It is unlikely that this can all be codified in simple checklists. Instead the regulatory project manager of tomorrow will have to be perpetually looking at their project(s) from many perspectives hence the multi-faceted eyes.

I wonder what other evolutuionary traits a project manager will need?

Ninja Cyclists - For goodness sake, take some personal responsibility!

In my standup set earlier this year I had a piece about ninja cyclists. At the time I thought it was an original idea, but I now find the term coined in the urbandictionary. Fortunately I had the same definition ie someone who spends all day stripping any reflective surface off their bike then dressing in dark clothes goes out after dark. They then career down the road expecting everyone else to get out of their way in the belief that our bat-senses will detect their approach without any aid from lights or warning sounds.

The relevance today is the convergence of two things. The first was the continuing debate triggered by a number of recent deaths of cyclists - 6 in London alone I think. The second was the fact that yesterday evening (after dark) I drove through London from Elephant & Castle and out through Tottenham and Enfield via the City. I was listening to LBC and, yes, the debate was about who was to blame for the carnage on the roads. Drivers blamed cyclists and cyclists blamed drivers.

When I am in London I am usually walking or using public transport so the road debate washes over me. It is extremely rare these days that I drive in London, let alone after dark, but last night I experienced first hand the "Ninja Cyclist". I will admit that what I say next is mostly irrelevant to daytime road use, but I will let the reader decide what parallels they can draw.

My point is that it is clear that most evening cyclists seem to have no awareness or no care of how difficult they are to see at night. I found myself looking out for cyclists' lights and really struggling to spot them. Many had no front light just a tiny blinking red dot the size of a dog's eye that was often attached to a backpack or a jacket and so was not always clearly visible even if you stood directly behind them. Some just a had a front light that was about as effective as a miners' lamp powered by a candle and NO back light and a number had not light at all that I could locate.

Few had light coloured clothing let alone anything reflective or hi-visibility. This meant that often the best way to spot them was by the absence of other light as they physically blocked the head lamps of oncoming cars. A bit like spotting a black hole in space - ie by what is not there, rather than what is.

I also suspect that the shift to orange streelights has not helped as it seems to lower the clarity of images at night.

On top of this I encountered cyclists riding three(!) abreast, presenting me with three shadows to track. I don't recall any of them attempting to signal their intended manouvres, leaving me to guess their likely movements and then I found them squeezing between gaps that I would struggle to walk through.

My conclusion was that the vast majority of cyclists out last night were not helping themselve at all. While sitting in my car I did not feel physically threatened, I did feel pyschologically threatened fearing that should there be a clash with a cyclist, they would certainly come off worse, yet I would probably still be blamed.

I wonder of those cyclists have any idea how difficult they make life. I am pretty sure that if I drove in London more I would invest in one of those video cameras to try keep a record of the world that I see as a driver.

At the end of the day London's roads were not designed for the weight or mix of traffic it carries, but for goodness sake these Ninja cyclists really must take some personal responsibility, else the mortalities will continue to mount.

NLP Day 2 & Overall Assessment

Well, Day 2 started with sexual innuendo - "Did you think of me in the shower this morning?" was the trainers openning gambit! Sorry you had to be there to understand, but it had clearly been a post-hypnotic suggestion planted by James (Hutchinson) the previous day - I did say in the previous post that he also trains hyponotherapists!

This level of innuendo continued for the rest of the day having the majority of the audience laughing frequently, with a group interacting at a similar level and almost certainly most going home feeling that they had had a good time.

Let me deal with the question of the humour first before I tackle NLP.

Looking around the room the male:female ratio was something like 30:70 with a strong HR/social work/counselling feel to at least the female contingent. Judging by the copious note-taking and an eagerness (verging on obsession in places) to understand and comply with instructions, many wanted to "believe". James played up to this, something that is not surprising when one one remembers that his primary interest is to sell more courses! At the end of course wrap up he did, in all fairness, acknowledge that his level of humour was something that had been commented on, but stated that he chose to use it as in his experience it helped. Fair play, he had an audience and he made the most of it - I am just not part of that demographic.

On Day 1 James had said that in building one's own business, 90% was about developing the business and 90% of that 90% was selling and he is definitely an entrepreneur and a salesman. I was certainly left with the feeling that he could sell snakeoil if he set his mind to it.

James also acknowledged that in coaching an therapy much of the work was done by having a personal brand that people recognised and wanted. Also if they had to wait to gain access and pay a significant amount the client was well on course to ensuring that they extracted value from the interaction. This was certainly true of the therapists whose work is modelled by NLP and can readily be seen as true today on coaching/counselling/therapy scenarios. James was certainly building that with members of this weeks audience with a string emphasis that if they signed up for the NLP practitioner course he dleivers it himself an they would have another ten days of his company and attention.

So back to the NLP. The first session spent a while (probably too long in my view) having people affirm what they had taken from Day 1. To be fair most people did return for Day 2 with only three people reported abesnt from around 90-100.

James then covered quite a lot of ground, threw out a lot more nuggets and did some practical exercises. The key pieces being positive language, hypnotic language, rapport, association and disassociation, submodalities, system checks and filters. This may have been new to some/many, but I have seen much of it in other courses. That does not mean that it was not good stuff, but delivered no "wow" factor for me.

The interesting piece was the dissociation element where we did an exercise to explore how to adjust a persons feelings about a situation. This, I guess, is what the NLP coach I experienced 10 years ago was trying to do. Once again though, and I was being honest about it all, it did little or nothing for me. It rather reminded me of a golf coach who would say "feel the club head open at the height of the backswing!" Unfortuantely I had no feel for the club head that was out of sight and behind me - all I could relate to was the positioning of my hands, that were physically attached to my sensory system.

I did feel sorry for my partner in this exercise, who was earnestly trying to experiment with the technique, but with the client from hell ie me.

I won't go on, but want to acknowledge a couple of things.

James admitted that one should not be too fixed on the pure NLP notation and elements. Indeed he changed some things himself and encouraged others not to use things if they felt wrong. I think this is most pertinent when trying to use NLP outside the counselling/coaching/therapy world. Not everyone wants to be coached and if they do they may not want to be coached by you.

James did touch on the question of is NLP manipulating or influencing, something that causes me discomfort. His argument was that the determining factor is your motivation ie if you are doing it soley for your own benefit then it is manipulation while if you believe you are doing it for their good it is not. I thought this rather convenient and could have taken up debate, which I didn't. His distinction presumes that you do know what is best for the other person and it felt as if he had applied his own filter to the question coming up with an answer that suited him - one my say hoisted on his own petard!

For me the distinction is the freedom of the other person to decide. No matter what you think your motivation is, if you are doing things to bring about an outcome of your choosing then it is manipulation.

James was also pretty honest in my eyes in telling people that if they bought his courses then they bought him! If that is what one wants then good, for me I doubt I could take ten days of that style of delivery - it would get in the way of and undermine the content.

So in summary what do I think? Well there is some useful stuff in NLP and it was worth reminding myself of parts of it. That said it should not be used blindly or uncritically. It probably works best in the coaching/counselling/therapy arenas and I am not about to label myself as an NLP change agent - what I use I will use silently.

I don't seem to be the ideal NLP client. This may be because I have done a lot of things before including a consiserable amount of self-hypnosis in my younger days. I understand and can relate at an intellectual level, but do not connect at the personal level. Whatever the cause if I need help I would not look to NLP first.

Lastly I suspect James is wasted. I think he would happily be a Tony Robbins, but something seems lacking. As I write this the word "authenticity" comes to mind ie it was laregly absent this weekend. This may not be the right word, but it is the one that appeared to me.

He certainly could be a successful stand-up comedian if he set his mind to it. Somehow no matter what he does he has to find his leverage and reach a wider audience.

So as weekends go, it was different to my usual weekends. It was entertaining and good to be reminded of some things. I recalibrated my thinking on NLP. It is now slightly more positive, but still not something I want to devote much more time to.

For me it is job done! One of the NLP foundations are that there is no such thing as failure and that each outcome is the perfect response to the strategy (sorry lots of NLP speak) so I certainly do not see this weekend as a waste or a failure and the outcome (of which this blog is part) the perfect outcome of the strategies James and I brought to the days.

NLP (Re-)Assessment?

Yesterday was Day 1 of a two day NLP Foundation Course. I invested my time as while I have not been a fan of NLP I was concerned I had not given it a fair go and may just have had a bad experience.

In summary, at the half way mark, I remain unconvinced.....though the course leader will of course blame that on me, saying that that outcome is the result of the personal "frame" I brought with me to the course.

One problem may be that I have been to a run too many courses of all sorts so I am picking up lots of things around the course as well as the pure content.

The first is that I find that my stand up comedy experience has a lot of relevance. James Hutchinson, effectively presented all day. His persona reminded me of a mix of Jim Carey and Michael MacIntyre, both of whom I can admire, but who can also become annoying. The day was riddled with jokes (setups, reveals, callbacks, etc), an increasingly annoying false smile and head/hair flick and playing to a number of middle aged ladies (social worker  comes to mind) who desperately want to believe and lap up the attention and innuendo.

There was a large pile of Christmas cracker-like nuggets (James' term) of wisdom. For example "every life coach should get a life first" and "all theories are lies". He is also very disparaging of visual learning - maybe that is why I am having a problem in that he does not acknowledge or cater to m pictures and patterns style of learning.

It certainly was a consumate performance, but that is what 90% of this felt like and James loves the attention. While I believe he has a passion for NLP his reveal that he is a trained hypnotherapist and in the last seven years he has set up slimming seminars and had a tooth whitening business that died, places him into the serial entrepreneur category in my mind, with all that brings!

That said there were some useful takeaways and reminders.

• The first is the importance of the frame or context in which something is said or done and that different people will have different contexts.
• Presumptions (or presuppositions) can create issues that did not exist and limit/divert outcomes.
• NLP is based on the work of therapists and effective therapy. In that situation the recipient is there voluntarily and seeking help. This is not the case in most work and everyday situations, where the prescribed structures and formats will more like come across as patronising, verbose and unhelpful.

This last point may be why my experience with an NLP coach was so unsatisfactory. The company set it up, I was not seeking the help, and the coach's use of full NLP techniques was so dissonant that it failed to provide any value. I think I just put that down to a bad experience and as a reminder that even the best tool can be used badly.

 

James did go off piste quite a bit and acknowledged it, providing more general management / life skills advice, but did not clearly identify the boundaries.

 

I will also take away his definition of NLP or Neuro Linguistic Programming as being a methodology that looks to observe and model excellence and find the fewest (programming) steps to change another person's behaviour and that in doing so NLP leaves behind a set of tools and practices. Cynically this suggests you can include what you want and discard what you don't when it comes to NLP, something that may be behind the rifts in NLP world.

 

Oh yes, James also reminded me how annoying it is to spend time within someone who never answers a question with anything but another question or a flippant laugh and comment.

An NLP Epiphany or Comfirmation of my Scepticism?

This weekend I will be spending two days on a NeuroLinguistic Programming course. My wife is not best pleased with the pressure of Christmas preparations growing, but it was an offer on a discount site that I decided to take advantage of.

I confess to going into the two days with mixed feelings. My exposure to NLP has been limited to

• A general osmotic awareness of NLP.
• Having been subject of a coaching session with an NLP practioner.
• Reading the book "NLP for Dummies" on holiday a couple of year ago.

My general awareness gives me considerable misgivings that NLP is a manipulative technique to be used on other people. Now I realise the inconsistency in my fear given that I have attended and taken away ideas for influencing other people from many management and negotiation courses. The line between what I see as acceptable influencing and unacceptable manipulation is not entirely clear - I just believe there is one. It may just be the word programming which implies that once set in motion the outcome is predetermined.

The coaching session with an NLP practioner was at a time of considerable professional stress and the company brought the coach in to help provide support and advice. It may be being a (literal?) scientist, but I found it weird and unhelpful to be asked to imagine a small man standing on my upturned hand and to tell him how I felt about what was happening at work. It is seemed silly, disrespectful and unhelpful. It certainly did not leave a positive impression.

While being starnge holiday reading I decided that I would have a look at NLP presented in a simple way. My lasting impression from the book was a degree of confusion of what came first. By this mean that as I read about different aspects it felt as if it was a collection of ideas and approaches that I have come across in other tools and techniques - ones which seemed to have made their cases better, at least in my eyes. There was also a touch of "The Secret" - another book I found unconvincing - seemingly written for those desperate to believe.

So, I enter into two days of professional training and I have no idea if I will have an epiphany and become a convert of whether this experience will confirm my scepticism. Either way I should better understand NLP and be able to better rationalise my feelings.

Stay tuned and next week I will report on my experience.

Evolution on Steriods?

- Frankly we should aspire to do better!

A friend was telling me the other day that he is giving a keynote speech on "change" soon and will focus on evolutionary change. When he said this, the hairs on my neck went up, even though this is not a new term and I was not sure why.

Then a few days later another contact told me that his message to managers is "enhancement & evolution".

At this point the light went on and I realised what was unsettling me and it was the word evolution and the suggestion that this is where managers should aspire in a world of growing pace and complexity.

As a scientist by training I can sometimes be too literal, but there is huge power in the words we choose to use and the messages they give to others, often subliminally and unintended. So what is my problem with "evolution"?

Well, I have three big reasons:-

• Evolution is the result of CHANCE! In simple terms the theory of evolution is that a population of similar creatures will be subject to a set of chance mutations (triggered by cosmic rays impacting on genes?) and that a mutation that makes the single creature slightly better suited to its environment, will have a (slight?) advantage for survival and/or reproduction and thus is more likely to be perpetuated. Unless we resort to theological discussion (and I don't intend to here) there is no purpose or conscious decision making in these changes, it is just chance and the changes that a single steps brings are all but indiscernible.
• Real significant change is usually the result of thousands of mutations/iterations over many generations and is accompanied by as many extinctions. This luxury of time is not open to modern management.
• Successful evolution is selected by the enhanced survival of the changed creature. Irrevocably linked to this is the extinction other creatures whose changes were less successful. The supposition of "chance" in the earlier point means that the creature has no determination in the likely success of its future, they don't choose to be faster of stronger! Few businesses really set out just to survive, they wish to thrive. Survival is based very much in the "now" while to thrive requires a forward view and all the uncertainty and risks that brings.

So the term evolutionary change lacks purpose, ambition and pace. That is my problem!

I understand the psychology of making a change seem simple and easy to accept - the term "evolutionary" plays to this - but can we live with that any longer? Business cycles are shorter and shorter, management tenure is dropping and the level and nature of competition seems to grow and change at a frightening pace. Survival is really not good enough and aspiring to evolution would seem to set a business up to fail.

The alternate to evolutionary change is usually cited as revolutionary or transformational change. For many this is neither easy to conceive and accept, nor to execute. My thinking is something in between, something that injects the sense of purpose, something like "directed evolution".

(NB I quite like "evolution on steroids", but I guess that sends as many wrong messages as right ones.)

Of relevance here are some other quotes that I have seen from leading entrepreneurs. I will paraphrase them as stating that the modern successful entrepreneur is someone who travels from failure to failure without losing heart until he or she finds success. While there are some true overnight successes there are many more who have taken a long while and carry many scars before they succeeded. They have purpose!

To be clear I am not suggesting that every manager and company should bet his/her/its existence on every change, or even on any change unless the situation is truly dire, but that progressive change should not be left to chance, and it needs to be bold enough that it will not be 100% safe.

Maybe the challenge should be, "What do we think we we need to be and how much can we afford to fail?" Of course the debate is more complicated than this, being more like, "How much of the business can we risk, for the benefit we believe we can generate?"

This will be more uncomfortable for many managers, but few business can afford to stand still and just keeping up with others is not good enough.

I hope you get the idea and please do let me know what you think?

Misdirection and Reveals

I enjoy it when "things" come together and on Friday night two of my recent explorations came together.

Early last year I attended a introduction to film making run by Raindance, a company that amongst other things runs film festivals. It was certainly stimulating and I still use bits of what was said in other parts of my life. And of course once they have your email you "hear" lots more. So it was that last week they asked if anyone was interested in attending the test screening of their first feature film.

I quickly reserved two tickets for my daughter and me and on early Friday evening we found ourselves with 60 other people in an increasingly warm basement viewing room watching an unfinished (their admission) low budget fetaure film.

The low budget mainly manifested through the small cast (three main characters and one bit part - Sadi Frost!) and limited locations (the rooms in one house, a shop and a couple of street pieces). The final music was not applied and there were still doubts about title, poster, etc.

To me it tried too hard to be arty with loads of soft shots, half shots, obscure shots, etc, but when my daughter and I spoke about it after that was not the problem. The problems were more to do with the script and/or its translation onto film.

The pace was pretty uniform/slow throughout and most of the plot(?) twists were telegraphed. For example think about a man (victim?) in a bath immobilised by rope, but with fingers splayed, when the "baddy" walks in with a pair of bolt cutters...what do you think will happen? Yes, you got it the victim lost a finger. And when he went in with a pair of pliers in his hand, out came a tooth.

There were elements of the film that appeared to have no purpose or if they did when they were "used", it was unclear exactly what and why. Some key dialogue was not clear and some key shots made it too hard for the viewer to take in critical information.

I don't feel it right to give the plot away, but in the end the film showed how the "baddy" did what he did, but not why. Well at least we did not see it.

We were asked to fill in a questionnaire after the viewing and then my daughter and I had dinner where we discussed it further. It was during this dinner I noticed the link between what I had recently learned on my standup comedy course.

There were three things that I took from the standup course and they were:-

• The power of misdirection
• The need for a clear reveal
• Every element must have a purpose/value - else ditch it

As I said too many plot elements were obvious and would have benefitted from greater misdirection - the impact of the reveal would have been so much more effective if we had not seen it coming.

Likewise the reveal has to be maximised, both in terms of how it is delivered to the audience and indeed when. By way of example there was key information that was contained in messages and pictures on a phone. The film limited the reveal to angle shots of the phone screen held in a hand. Given the fact that the audience needed to read the text and see the pics, a full screen shot would have been much clearer.

As for the third point, there were elements that were never explained or developed. For example the female lead was bound while the "baddy" dealt with her husband. For some reason she was bound and suspnded in an elaborate form of Japanese rope bondage know as shibari. Why was this so? Apart from a few lines of something like oriental wisdom this was not explained or developed. And if one was intent on quickly immobilising a victim, it is doubtful the first thought would be complex rope work.

Overall it was an interesting evening that linked some of my personal explorations and gave rise to good conversation with my daughter.

We both agreed that this showed how hard it is to create "entertainment" well, whether it be film, comedy or theatre, and we can appreciate that a little better now.

Having a rethink about Mr Depp.

Strangely and to her mother's mystification one of the things my daughter and I share is Doctor Who. There are a few more for another day, maybe, but they include Deep Purple and Hawaii Five-O

Regarding Dr Who, I used to watch it as a kid - in black and white. I was THAT kid who hid behind the sofa when the Daleks came on, but I seem to recall the scariest for me were the cybermen.

Anyway when the new run started I watched them all and my daughter started to too. It seems that many of her friends did also. In recent years it has been a fixed date for us to watch Dr Who, live if possible, and if not then as soon as possible.

Ellen and her friends exchange text messages as the plots unfold and comment/rate an episode at the end. Fortunately neither of us go to the extreme of conventions or dressing up in character, but she has been enthralled with each change of Doctor. The latest one was no exception.

I think it fair to say that that particular jury is still out over the choice of Peter Capaldi. I am rather more optimistic, but only time will tell.

Before the announcement I had been thinking about who else might fit the role and quite liked the idea of Jonny Depp. Part of me still does, but having seen The Lone Ranger on Friday and being gently amused I am wondering if Mr Depp can pick up the pace at all. It seems as if Captain Jack Sparrow, Willy Wonka and Tonto all have something of the humour and quirkiness required for Dr Who, but all lack the energy and pace that also plays a key part in the Doctor's character.

I would certainly be interested to see Jonny screen test for the Doctor and I think that it would be an interesting development for him as an actor. Who knows (pun intended!), maybe next time?

Bullying - Memories of an unlikely(?) victim.

I was one of the largest boys in my school and playing county level rugby as a lock forward and while I did not think it at the time, I was the victim of bullying. The main perpetrator was a smaller boy who we will call "Deano". I had known him since I moved the area at the age of 11 and we both moved through the end of infant school, through two years of secondary schooling before both moving to a grammar school at age 13. While he did not live next door he lived close and for the latter two schools we both bus'ed to school using the same bus.

He was more the artist (quite literally) and I was the geeky scientist. I will also admit that I stood out being almost freakishly tall (5'10" at age 11 and 6'1" by 13). I was also rather socially naive, somewhat ungainly and if I am honest had some Tourette's type physical tics. I tried hard to talk about music and football, but I knew little about either and it showed. I made some classic faux pas'. I had no girlfriend (are you honestly surprised?).

I was probably scholastically smarter than him, but he was far more street smart and cooler than me. He was part of a group and something of the leader. He was a great artist, always drawing in his books copies of comic book heroes and fantasy cars. Skills like this impress other boys at that age. He was certainly skilled and I believe that he went on to paint matts (the fantatstic backdrops used when Green Screening for major films) at Pinewood!

But he was a bully. Mainly verbal, after all I was bigger. That said I was something of a gentle giant off the rugby pitch and rarely got angry or lost my temper. As such I guess I was someone he could poke and make fun off quite safely. And he did. I took it as the price of being part of the group.

In those days bullying was really seen as only a physical activity. The psychological perspective was not really recognised.

I can't say that it came to a stop, but it lessened severely one day about the age of 15 or 16 when I snapped. Waiting at the bust stop to come home, something was said, done, I really don't know what, and I lost my temper for one of the few times in my life. All I recall now was that in very short order I had Deano lying on the ground and me sitting on his chest with every opportunity to pummel his face. I didn't pummel him, at least I don't remember that I did, and the red mist lifted, but I think the shock I gave him in downing him physically after all the years I had just taken his poking was enough to change it.

I can't say that we are best mates, in fact I haven't seen him in 30-odd years, but our respective mother's occassionally exchange information. They may have known of the bullying, but if they did it wasn't because of me telling them.

I have always been a physically large person, but there was then and, if I am honest, there have been other occassions since when I was susceptible to psychological bullying. That I started to recognise the problem meant I could deal with it and avoid vulnerable situations.

I write this not for any sympathy, I am over the problems and happy with who I am and where I am, but rather as a reminder not to assume that the victims of bullying are the small and weak and not all bullies are large. All it needs is someone to be different in some way and another person to be prepared to take advantage of that for whatever reason (jealousy, guilt, fear, ......)

A sad sign of the times

I am a man of a certain age who feels he is well behaved and safe to leave with young children, but it seems that the modern world puts every man, no matter who he is, under suspicion.

The incident that triggered this post happened this morning as I walked to the station. I walk down a wide open road in broad daylight at around 7:30. While it is not busy there are houses down both side and small but regular flow of cars, cyclists, runners, dog walkers and other commuters walking the same route as me. There is no record of trouble and I think it is very safe (as am I).

This morning I was walking down the left hand side when I heard some footsteps behind me (I am one of those who doesn't keep earphones in as I walk!). I looked back and about 20 yards behind me was a young woman. I will guess she was mid-to-late twenties, around 5'10" in flat shoes and dressed in business attire.

I didn't look back any more but heard her cross to the right hand side of the road. She was walking faster than me and gradually passed me, me on the left, she on the right; in doing so she passed a dogwalker. I did wonder why she crossed over? If she was going to the station like me then teh shortest route would be to stay on the left like me.

I watched her draw ahead and watched when she had 20 yards on me, yes you guessed, she crossed back onto the left and carried walking in froont of me all the way to the station.

I can only conclude that she crossed the road to avoid walking up to me and passing on the same pavement. So how does this make me feel? Well I am not quite sure, but I know it makes me feel uneasy.

In part I am angry that someone should judge it necessary. I am also sad that the world has come to this. Had it been a cold dark night with poor lighting and no others around I could have understood it, but at 7:30 in broad daylight with the normal population moving around it annoys me that anyone should feel they needed to do it with me as the other party.

OK rant over.

OMG Shoreditch was heaving!

I have worked in or around the City of London for over 30 years but it still has the capacity to surprise me. Last night was a case in point.

I was invited to a "summer party" in the roof top bar of what I guess is a new boutique hotel. It was just north of the City in Shoreditch, a short walk from Liverpool Street Station.

This is an area I cannot say I have visited much. I think that the last time I ventured that way was during general rail strikes of the 90's when I drove into town and found a place to park in the side streets there. It was pretty run down and there was always a risk that your care, or at least its wheels, would not be there when you returned.

What a contrast. To be fair last night was a) Thursday night - the night when many/most people go out and b) was rather mediterranean in its feel. Not only had the day been warm the breeze that was blowing was warm, reminding me of an evening on the Algarve or similar.

So last night we had a trendy bar, with entry via a doorman and elevator. It seemed OK when I walked up at around 6, but when I walked back at almost 9pm the area was heaving, crowds of young, fashionable people, queues to get into packed bars and outside areas, music on the street and spilling out or windows and restaurants and food on most corners. Oh yes and some rather Parisian sets of bistro tables on the pavements.

It was still warm and that must have helped - it might not have been so up tempo had the temperatures been more down beat, but it was what it was and I was surprised.

It is certainly up and coming (or maybe it has alread come?) and I suspect that I will go back there again. It felt a little like Spitalfields did after it was redeveloped and before it became as "corporate" as it currently is.

I can recommend a visit and I have no doubt that I will be back.

Putting last years challenge to use.

I am often asked "Why? Why did you do that?" Mostly this relates to the challenges I have been setting myself these last few years, especially the most recent one of stand up comedy.

Well the simple answer is because I think it is good to keep learning new things and it is amazing how much can be used in either my personal or professional life.

Last year I looked at film making. I was an interesting experience and while I have not yet (and probably won't) write a script or produce a film, I have just put together a montage video for my daughter's 18th birthday. It took me plenty time, but I am pretty happy with the results. I think that some of what I heard last year rubbed off and the Serif MoviePlus software helped with the rest.

Apart from a couple of the pics/clips my daughter was happy too and has shown her friends, so I feel I can share it here. It is a little over 9 minutes long so won't take too much of your day.

 

I know this posting is a little self-indulgent, but as a father I think one can do that once in a while.

Life is much more complicated these days!!

I am working on regulatory change in financial services and have been trying to explain to some of my peers and colleagues that we are in a new world. The following graphics have proved useful in helping others understand.

To give a littel context to those not involved, the G20 countries agreed back in 2009 to implement new regulations and controls aimed at preventing another financial crisis such as the world experienced back in 2008. Whilst in broad agreement on the intent and approach each country headed off to make the necessary changes.

In the past regulatory change for most people has been a single set of rules, from a single regulator in a specific country/region. In this was usually a prescriptive piece on what needed to be done and when. This is not so these days, at least not in the field of major derivative regulation.

Currently the best known and most advanced are the US with the Dodd Frank (DF) act and Europe (including the UK) with the European Market Infrastructure Regulations (EMIR). Both place obligations on counterparties to deals involving counterparties that are deemed relevant.

To illustrate this simply, for DF, I drew the 3 x 3 grid below. The boxes with ticks show the business transactions covered by the DF rules, ie those with a US party (either client or market counterparty).

A similar grid for EMIR looks like this

 

 

This is clearly similar, but different.

 

If we now combine them we get this grid. In it some points are clearly only covered by Dodd Frank, while others are only covered by EMIR; and then some are covered by both (or possibly either).

 

 

The implication for a fund manager is that this is not "one size fits all", instead one has to consider where on the grid a particular trade or relationship falls and then decide upon the appropriate obligations.

 

In the "Either or Both" boxes the right answer may and probably will differ rule by rule. There is some movement between the US and European regulators to deem compliance with a compatible regime sufficient, but even with just two their rules differ. For example DF only requires one partyu, the senior party to the trade to report, while EMIR will require both to report. The implication is that for a european client trading with a US Swap Dealer, the US Swap dealer must report to a UStrade repository under DF, but as that is only one sided reporting EMIR will still require the european client to report to a european trade repository too.



Firms will need to think carefully about how they respond in the cross over boxes and how best to style there processes. By way of illustration and for the sake of argument, if one could freely choose one or other regulatory regime in the cross overs, then one might decide to deal with all US client business under Dodd Frank and all European client business under EMIR and deal with "other" clients case by case. Alternatively one might stripe it by counterparty rather than client. To add complications one may need one approach for one regulation and a different one for another.

Did I mention that they are implementing at different times too??


This is going to require plenty of "smarts", looking at these changes rather holistically and making judgements that are right for the firm. The alternative is an increasingly complex set of operational processes and relationships with clients and counterparties that will undoubtedly breed duplication and inefficiency - and thus avoidable cost.

I think that unless firms are smart they will suffer much more than necessary and may indeed be crushed by the growing burden. The time to start acting differently is now.

I hope this makes sense and if it encourages even one person to think again about how they are tackling this world of complicated change then it has been worthwhile!

Now please don't take this wrong!

There is something that feels so very wrong about yesterday's announcement that the UK government is placing a blanket ban on broadband services to home in Britain; that is unless you specifically request to have access to pornography.

Let me say that I am not advocating pornography, though I will admit having seen some over the years, initially as old magazines left in bushes by older boys through to the more modern digital versions. What I object to is something around the infringement of personal freedoms and the use of blunt instruments to grandstand for political advantage.

Part of the freedom is for an adult to view legitimate materials including pornography without having to feel a social pariah, but having to ask for the filters to be lifted. How long before this becomes a question on employment applications - "Do you have pornography enabled at home?"

I love this country and the freedoms we enjoy. I guess I have taken them for granted, but this one winds me up. If they can do this what will they do next? Anyone with any experience of these content filters knows that they are far from problem free or indeed complete.

A true story has an ex-colleague trying to buy strings ofr his guitar from work. This was allowed as the management recognised that allowing some personal use of the internet was actually a positive thing, but could be buy a G-string? I think not as the content filter prevented it.

I am also aware that there are ways around most of these and it will probably end up that any technology competent teenager will know how to get around the filters.

As my daughter has grown up we have placed various control, education and oversight. In the end we have a rounded young adult that we are proud of and who can deal with the curve balls life serves her. I much prefer this outcome.

And as for David Cameron, stop showboating with window-dressing initiatives such as this and fix the real problems with the economy. That is what you were elected for, not to place blanket bans across the country - we do not live in China!

7 minutes of infamy!!!

Well at long last I received the DVD of my standup comedy showcase. I am not sure why, but I was nervous about looking at it. My memory of the actual event is something of a grey, ill-defined silent movie so I was interested to see if anyone actually laughed?

Well the answer is taht some did, but maybe not that much. I would like to blame the sound recording for missing the laughs and I think that there may well be an element of that, but in then I recalled the context. I was the first act up. The audience was sober. And I was new.

All in all the video proves that I actually did it and I didn't die! It does however confirm that I should not (and indeed will not) give up the day job.

So now I have positioned it here is the video itself.

By way of contrast within minutes of receiving the video I received an email about the lecturing I did to the class of Chinese HR Directors at the Henley Management College. In that I was informed that the feedback on my session (three hours with simulataneous translation!) was 96%. That sounds pretty good to me.

I am not sure what to take from these two pieces. Is that I should focus on the lecturing and forget the comedy..........or..........maybe I should try standup comedy with a translator in tow and a chinese audience?

Anywhat it has certainly been a interesting couple of weeks.

A week on!

It is a week since I last blogged. I find that interesting as I have not felt the inclination to do so for the last seven days. It is not that I have not been doing interesting things, but maybe the better weather has had a calming effect on my mind?

This post is a reflection on the week, and as such anyone looking for more stimulating discourse is very welcome to click away now.

My last post was just prior the annual Curry Cup. Briefly this is an annual fixture amongst a group of friends (22 years now!) where the group all go out for a curry after. The winner gets to choose (and organise!) next year's venue and match and the loser gets the hottest curry in the house. The only choice the loser has is which type of meat?

I have played with this group for the last ten years or so and as a poor golfer I have been the recipient of the "hot curry" more than once, including last year. This year however I finished well out of the curry zone and as such enjoyed the freedom on the menu and relinquished the trophy toilet seat to an old friend.

It was a long, but comfortable drive home on Saturday, made all the better for the Lions winning the last test in Australia. There is something special about good radio commentary and that is what I was left with.

My personal time this week has been dominated with trying to make a video for my daughter's upcoming 18th birthday. My wife wants a whole collection of photographs and video clips of my daughter, from birth to today, put on a video over some music tracks.

Sounds simple eh? Well it is easier than it was in the past, but still not easy. I use Serif's MoviePlus X6 and it does a decent job with a lot of flexibility, but it still takes a long time; time to scan a load of old photographs, time to go through and select digital photographs, time to review and clip video pieces, time to make the music work and time to try and put it all together so that it looks decent.

The overall length will be around 9-10 minutes and I have easily taken 9-10 hours so far - and it is not complete yet. The other night the problems started. Firstly the amount of processing required caused the PC chip to overheat and the system to just close down. Fortunately I did not lose work, but I did lose time as I needed to let the PC cool down. I should say that I have a decent PC, but it is an all-in-one so maybe the cooling is not optimal?

Now I am aware of the heat issue I can deal with it, but complexity has appeared. I was trying to do it all in one video file. This was OK until the number of clips and effects became too numerous and the complexity caused performance to mimic swimming through treacle. At least that is my suspicion of the cause. So now I am trying to break the video into pieces that I will render and the construct at the end.

I will state the obvious - video editting is not my day job, so I know that I probably miss some obvious shortcuts or simpler approaches. This all adds to the time. I have a week left to complete this and believe that I will have it done in time. That said, I am pretty sure it will fall short of what my wife wants/expects, but it will be a hell of a lot better than nothing.

On another video note, I have not seem my standup comedy video yet and will have to chase them soon.

Not A Bad Week!

I am currently sitting in beautiful morning sun on the sea front in North Devon. Shortly I will go a visit an old boss who lives not far from here and then back to this foreshore to play our annual golf competition - The Curry Cup. This year we are playing at Royal North Devon Golf Club before the traditional curry this evening. I hope to avoid the vindaloo this time - the losers prize(!?!?!).

I drove down yesterday and joined the guys for a practice round. It was a long drive from London taking around 6 hours, albeit with two stops. I set of to cloudy sky and light drizzle finally seeing the first patch of blue sky around Bristol. I then when through three bands of rain before reaching Westward Ho! and blue sunny skies.

Yesterday's golf was not bad but there was a breeze. Today there is less wind!

On Tuesday I was running a session at the Henley Management course for HR Directors of a Chinese company with over half a million employees. It was my first experience of working with simultaneous translation. I was there for over three hours and was quite drained at the end. I did learn that there is no such thing as "one last quick question" in China. When this was asked at different points by the course director it resulted in one of delegates standing up and talking earnestly at me for over two minutes in Chinese. I, of course, had no idea what was being said and had to wit for the translation. This took another minute or two and usually started with "I have three questions...."!!!

The feedback from the Henley session seems to have been good so hopefully I will be invited back to do more.

So the week draws to an end with golf coming up and the video of my comedy standup showcase should arrive any day. I wonder if my wife will appreciate the concept of "comedic value"?

A Somewhat Surreal Evening

After a full weekend, I found myself at the Royal Albert Hall for a Jethro Tull concert. Ian Anderson has always been a bit different so I wasn't sure what to expect,

In the end we received a evening go progressive rock during which he/they played two complete albums, Thick As A Brick and Thick As A Brick 2. Along with Ian's trademark flute playing (and lots of standing on one leg ...... Not too shabby for a man of his age) we also enjoyed(?) an accordian, multiple appearances of a frogman in full scuba gear, plenty of mime and lastly Marc Almond as a guest vocalist.

During the encore we saw Marc singing Locomotive Breath - I didn't see that one coming!

It was odd.....a rock concert where no one stood up until the end and I would say the majority of the audience - maybe 70%+ - were male. And probably 80%+ were over 45.

As I said somewhat surreal.

Reaching The End Of The Comedy Roller Coaster

Until yesterday I did not realise how much of my time and thought this standup comedy thing had taken, last week more than ever.

On Saturday evening I was the openning act at the The Comedy School Student Showcase near Camden. Why I was selected to go first I don't know. It might have been a compliment about confidence or maybe that my material more suitable for a sober audience - two hours later I think alcohol was certainly contributing to the atmosphere.

On Wednesday we had been invited to an extra half hour one-to-one with our comedy coach. This was unexpected and we thought a response to the slating we had received the previous week. I tend to think now that it is fairly usual. In practice it was a "script" session, where we went over what we had written with the coach helping sharpen the material. I am still impressed how his mind works and finds the comedic value in almost anything.

He made what I though were good comments and I rewrote the material before the class next evening.

At the class we all did our pieces and then received feedback. To say we were slated again would be an understatement. This was certainly not a nurturing coach, but rather a psychological bruiser.
Maybe that is what is needed for the world of standup, but I know everyone went home somewhat deflated.

The main complaint was a lack of emotional connection and texture. For me the more I polish material the less emotion tends to be in there, so I felt conflicted. We were being taught the importance of the right words in the  right place in the right way, yet when I focussed on that I lost the rest. He kept saying that I reminded him of Patrick Moore!

As this was our last session I had drink with one of the guys, a surreal young Australian who reminds me of Noel Fielding. We talked about things that we could do better or different. I am disappointed to say that he didn't turn up on Saturday for the showcase, but maybe I will see his name somewhere in future - it is not one you forget - Shaulan!

For me I decided to go with what I felt was me. A more gaggy and observational delivery and I cut out the true but rather re-engineered stories. I was doing this between noon and 3 on Staurday afternoon before the show. Nothing like being last minute, but I felt happier at the end. I have no idea what our coach would have said and he was unable to be there on Saturday evening so I may never know, but he had said that we should find ourselves and our audience would find us - I think that is what I did - find myself I mean.

Of course nature conspired with the Northern Line being closed for engineering works so what should have been a relaxed journey became a nightmare of finding and then riding a replacement bus service. In the end I arrived on time.......just.

As I walked to the venue I had to lauch. It had been cited as Cecil House, but the in big letters it proclaimed itself to be the English Folk Dance and Song Society. Now this is one of the last places on earth you could expect to find me. The next two being sitting on the papal chair (I am not Catholic) and the other being High Hefner's mansion (I am not that lucky). I am the only person I know that was banned from dancing at their own wedding and as a precaution I had to mime my vows.

Anyway I did find some fellow performers there and the process started. They set up the running order and as I said I was first. Nerves were obviously getting to others, but for me I had done all I could. That said I decided to take advantage of being first and build a reference to the location into the opening of my act.

As the time approached I was pacing behind the entrance door. I heard my name and then I was on!

I think it went OK.....only when I see the video will I know. I got some laughs - I think - and I delivered most of what I intended to. I know I forgot and left out some, but I think it flowed OK. Afterwards my fellow class member had nice words about how it went and in the interval a couple of people from the audience had nice words. Maybe it was OK.

The best think about going first was I could then get a drink and watch the rest. No one died and we made a full show of around 2 1/2 hours.

We then received our certificates and the adventure was over. I seriously doubt that I will ever do it again, but I guess you never know. At least I know I could. I do have Ellen's 18th Birthday coming up sos maybe the Father's speech will be a little better that it might otherwise have been.

It is a shame my daughter was not there, but I did take the opportunity at the end of the act to mention her and wish her well in her acting career. That should be captured on video and eventually she will hear and know it.

All in all this was a more demanding challenge than I expected. I took a lot of time and energy from me. It made me look at certain things anew, with fresh eyes and I may have one or two new good friends.

Now to get back to the other things in life - like more interesting blogs and start thinking about Challenge 2014. I have already seen some fencing classes and am toying with that, but we shall see.

Thank you for sharing my journey and if the video is any good I may put it on Youtube. It is not due for a couple of weeks so please don't hold your breath.

Week 6 - This Comedy Lark Is Not Easy!

I am just in from Week 6 of my course with 10 days until the showcase and still feeling quite confused. Last week I was disappointed with the feedback I received. My style was presentational and I was likened to Patrick Moore ( Is that such a bad thing? ).

This week I decided to do less formal preparation, to try and be more conversational as our coach seeks, and I put more of me into it. I bared parts of my heart and soul, unsure if it would be funny, but with faith that I would find the comedy in it.

I was still described as presentational, requiring more emotional texture and set up, more misdirection. In truth I am quite confused and really unsure how the next ten days will go.

I was surprised how airing some of the items brought strong emotions to the surface. I will have to watch that! I am sure a coach would say to try and harness the emotions, but given this evening that may too much to ask in ten days.

I am torn between trying to follow this path the coach is setting or to follow my instincts and put together more of a gag driven, less personal routine. I have fifty plus years of training/development in logic and reason. I can link A to B to C to.......to Z faster than most people and I can admire how our coach can twist and turn the raw, poor material we are dishing up into something with a higher comedic value. I just can't find that in me, my mind seems to be wired differently.

I also struggle, and this may be just that I have been alive longer than the rest of the class and heard more jokes, but I struggle when the highest praise goes to people delivering old material, albeit masquerading it as their own story.

Of course a large part could be that unlike others on the course I have no ambition to be a professional standup. I have no fear of standing on stage either. I wanted to understand standup better and in that I have succeeded. I will do my best not to let myself down next week, but I am aware that it is not make or break

Anyways our coach seems to think we need more help before the showcase. He has set up additional half hour 1-2-1 sessions next week. I need to have my material written down and right now I have no idea which direction I will take or what material I will use. Instead I shall be away to my bed and hope a night's sleep will bring a brighter vision tomorrow.

Dors bien, mes amis.
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Not such a good evening - Week 5 at The Comedy School

I went into last evening feeling good. I had worked hard to develop material and thought I had some good stuff. I had worked at scripting and shaping it using the "tools" we had been given in Week 4, and I had taken the challenge to build gangsta rap into the piece, no matter how odd that may sound and certainly felt.
I had also worked on some physical aspects of my clothing that I had worked in.
The first session was two previous students coming back, giving us some of their comedy and then answering questions. If I am honest I was slightly underwhelmed or maybe my expectations are too high. The two comedians were ladies, both having graduated from the school in 2008 or 2007, I don't recall. One was now making it semi-professionally, but had probably done around 1,000 unpaid gigs before she started making money, the other has done less having a day job "for the government", but now wants to lift her game.
In truth, to me, their routines were not that funny, but then for one reason or another they are not professionals after 5 years so maybe I am setting my standards too high. They were honest in their answers and there was a part of me thinking, "Thank goodness I don't aspire to me a comedian, but am taking the course for fun".
That said I don't want to be humiliated and do think I have some good material. I still thought so when we started the second session, ie we students standing up and getting critiqued by the tutor. I was feeling pretty good and thinking I had followed instructions, used what we had been given and stretched myself out of a comfort zone.
This week we were just seven; no girls this week. The tutor chose the running order so I got to see a few stand up before me. I don't know if this was good or bad.
I felt they were less prepared than I was, and they were picked up on that, but they were also picked up on lack of shading in the emotional content. There was good feedback about how to better present stuff, but I was left doing a mental rewrite. I was scoring elements out entirely and reordering the rest.
When I got up I went into my revised routine, but I had to leave out a load of what I had previously thought of as good gags. A couple of my pieces got a few of the group chuckling and smiling, but then I was stopped by the tutor.
Having first noticed I was "confident" on stage he started picking holes, albeit with suggestions how to improve things. My stuff was obviously not as good as I thought. In particualr I was told it was too presentation like, but I think that is the result of preparation, polishing and practice.
Fair enough we are there to learn so I sat down in thoughtful mode.
I found the evening got more difficult, as I then saw two other students get quite praised for doing some very average and I thought contrived and unoriginal stuff. This left me rather bemused and if I am honest a little angry.
 Now I could try and rationalise and say the tutor felt they needed more building up thn knocking down, but at the end of the day I think I have to accept that standup is an art form in itself and that the tutor knows best even if I don't like it.
My plan now is to suck it up and try a different tack next week, taking onboard the comments made. That said I have decided to drop a couple of peices that make me uncomfortable and to prepare less with the hope that it does appear more spontaneous.
It obviosuly got to me as I was aware of waking during the night and my mind goind over it again, but then this morning I recalibrated expectations.
The comedians we all see on TV are, in footballing terms, the equivalent of Premiership players. The two ladies who performed for us last night are probbaly Conference players, while my fellow students and I are South Herts Sunday Pub league 2, and I am probably the stand in goalkeeper who was asked ot play half an hour before kick off!

Rugby Plagiarism?

Last night I watched my recording of the Britis & Irish Lions first tour match of 2013 on Australian soil. They played the Western Force, not the strongest opposition, and won comfortably.

What made me smile was the post match disucssion that highlighted the strategy of using big strong ball carriers out wide and moving the ball to them pretty quickly. Moving from one side of the pitch to the other they stretched their opponents defence and managed to score nine tries,many of them right on the touchline.

Along with George North, the giant Welsh wing, players like Maku Vunipola, Jamie Heaslip and Tom Croft all appeared in the five metre channel. It was simple, but very effective.

This brought back fond memories of the Henley RFC under-16 tour to Le Havre back in 1975 I think. As a team we were above average size for our age group and had been pretty successful. This your culminated as the curtain raiser for an important French club match, between Toulouse and Biarritz I think.

We had all stayed with the families of the french players and I recall attending a big family lunch before the match. Remember this was long before the professional era and we were under sixteens! So looking back the ploy to ply us inexpereinced English boys with copious quantities of wine was probably intentional and not just generous hospitality.

In the changing room before the match we discovered that a number of players had developed involuntarily and hitherto unrecognised sidesteps. This necesssitated some rejigging of our game plan and team line up. This was before squads so we only had 15 players to make up a 15 man team. No one could be left out.

Two players had developed particularly strong side steps so they were consigned to the wings. these were two large and mobile forwards. One was Chris Challis an All-England schoolboy sprinter who was also 6'2" and weighed around 13 stone. The boy called Jeremy (I forget his surname) was a big prop forward who could also run well.

Our game plan became

• Win the ball
• Shift the ball to the wing as quickly possible.
• At the breakdown win the ball back
• Shift  the ball to the other wing
• Repeat as we progress up the field until we score
• Start again

I think Warren Gatland must have been in the stands that day! I don't remember the score, but I do recall it was a successful day for Henley.

Good plans are worth repeating and I am very happy we were able to show the Lions how to do it.

Good days!!!