Somethings you REALLY cannot script!!!

I will start this with a BIG BIG WARNING that anyone who is easily offended or very conservative when talking about sexual matters may want to leave this post now - you have been warned.

I did consider not posting this, but decided that I had set my stall out at the start and made it clear that this would be an eclectic set of postings of things that caught my eye, interested me or amused me. This certainly amused me.

I also recognise that some of the humour in here may well work best for British readers, but that it is what it is. I know from the google stats that I get readers from Nepal and Mongolia, Brazil and China, Russia and Singapore, so I wonder what they will make of this if they read on?

I will now pad a good few rows that will fill most peoples' initial screen, but if you wish to continue please scroll down and the blog will continue.
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So......it was a nice spring day today and I decided to do some work in the garden. Two sides or our property are bounded by a pretty ancient hedge, with a path the other side. This hedge is mixed Hawthorn, Holly and Ivy with seven large trees along its length. This makes it sound grander than it is, but certainly the amount of fallen wood and other bits makes for a continual clear up.

Today I was doing that with a beautiful robin for company, pecking at the ground where I had been and I was enjoy the sun, the breeze and the general wild life that was awakening.

A common image associated spring in the UK is leaping hares, but today that is not what I saw. Instead I saw a flourescent pink flash in the middle of  the hedge. I thought it was a kid's toy or something as we often have empty cans or bags thrown in there. However this time, instead of a hare I came across a rabbit, a rampant rabbit to be precise. Now I expect many British readers will know what I mean, but I don't intend to explain it for the rest. Instead I suggest that you just google "rampant rabbit" adding "ann summers" if you need to.

So without going into details this "rabbit" looked to be a new item, as it was neither wet nor dirty. It did make my wife reel back when it started moving as she touched it!!!!

Her reaction was that she did not want it in her garbage so what were we going to do with it. My response, a man's, was well let's save the batteries and in that is another tale.

Of course the batteries had to be "long life", but in this instance they were also branded "Mothercare".

As I said you could not script it! Well it gave us a good laugh.

Lastly, if anyone read through and was offended then I apologise, but you were warned.

PS: Day two and the rabbits are breeding! This morning, in the same spot, a second (different model) rabbit was found sitting (waiting?). While unboxed and without batteries, it is pristine and certainly unused.

So what next?

PPS: No more rabbits so maybe the population explosion is over!!!