My Top Five Regrets..........

I saw today a link to an article in the Guardian (not my usual read!) entitled Top five regrets of the dying which I found an interesting read.

I won't repeat the article here, but the five identified by a nurse who had cared for dying patients were

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.
2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings.
4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Without wanting to give too much away, while I think I have addressed/embraced a couple of these, there are still a couple I can empathise with.

What made me think though were what might be the top five regrets of a project manager.

I have wracked my fading memory of 30 years of change and feel lucky that I don't feel many regrets. Yes I have made some mistakes, but I have learnt something from every one.

At times I have opened my mouth and expressed heartfelt opinions that may have cost me opportunities, but I don't regret doing so. In each case, time has shown that my thoughts were valid and the each experience has given me the opportunity to improve my communication skills. Similarly for each door that closed another, better one opened.

If I have a regret it is that I did not network better in my early and mid career. It is something I have come to late in life, through necessity and I wonder if I might have found an even brighter path had I worked harder at it earlier. But then I was in permanent employment and networking did not seem as necessary.

Also I think I might have sought out a personal sponsor earlier. Someone who could have helped me transition between roles and navigate the world of corporate politics better than maybe I did.

I have made decisions that put my family considerations over my professional ones, and in doing so probably missed some opportunities. In no way do those count as regrets - family comes first - full stop.

Lastly at times I stayed longer in roles that maybe hindsight would suggest was best, but again I look back and feel I made the best decisions I could at the time, and believe I would make the same ones again if I were in the same position - so how can one regret these?

I have never been a clone or easily pigeonholed. I am just good at what I do and the more I do what I enjoy the better I get....funny that. This may all sound very smug. I certainly don't intend it to be. I would be interested in hearing the experience of others though I recognise that it is easier to do so anonymously.